Welcome to the HOOD! Not just any hood, Grade 1 Motherhood!
One week down and thoughts of day drinking crossed my mind on more than one occasion.
One day in and Desi brought home his reading file. I mean it's got a few words in there, nothing serious, all words that he knows.
These words however also form a sentence. A cat, A pot, A mat, A tap... and a few more.
Again nothing serious.
Our conversation goes as follow:
Me: Please sound the first one (cat)
Desi: c a t
Me: Well done, now read the sentence A ...
Desi: c a t
Me: No start with A and add the word
Desi: A c a t
Me: Ok well done, don't sound it now, just read the word - by now I am hissing through clenched teeth
Desi: A c-a-t
Me: FAAAAAKKKKK!!!! It's A CAT!!!!
Me: Instantly feel like a complete dick wad, and relay that to child.
Desi: What's a dick wad?
Me: Don't say that word, it's an asshole
Desi: Sis mom you have a potty mouth!
Me: Sorry boy, ok let's try again, can you read the sentence please.
Desi: A c-a-t
Me: Ok, read the sentence
Desi: A c-a-t
Me: Wondering whether reading really is such an integral part of ones life?
Desi: A cat
Me: Well done, now was that sooooo hard?
Desi: Mom maybe you should just be calm, and then I can do it!
Mom 0 - Desi 1
So here I sit one week in, I have lost my shit 3 out of 5 days, fetched him late on his first day, and wanted to cry in a pillow, because let's be honest....Do any of us actually know that the hell we are doing?
I am starting to feel that any parent that has it together all the time, definitely is day drinking, or xanaxing.
So I will head into next week, a little less shouty, and a little more tolerant, and remind myself that as long as my child isn't an asshole in society (which I was this week), he will make it out on the other side. Even if we c-a-t a little longer than the others.
So mommies, to all of you battling the way through, I see you. You are not alone, and hell you're doing a great job!